It’s Christmas time, again, and the pressure to find innovative gifts weighs heavily on me as I stare blankly at the retailer’s shelves bowed by the weight of thousands of options.
Buying for women is easy – most women will be happy with a gift voucher, a facial, perfume or, if all else fails, a Woollies bubble bath set.
But men are the really tricky creatures to buy Christmas gifts for, which is oddly paradoxical as they’ve traditionally been the recipients of soap-on-a-rope, paisley ties and Superman underwear for years.
But things have changed.
This isn’t the nineties anymore, and although Old Spice has made a comeback, men have become more complex to buy for than a 56-year old, divorced kugel from Sandton.
I remember the year I bought my husband a jersey from Old Khaki and his sister bought him a Predator action figurine (not a doll, he says). The jersey lay sadly in a corner near the discarded wrapping paper while he pored over the detail in the disfigured plastic creature cradled lovingly in his hands. Men. I silently vowed to never be the brunt of Christmas-Gift-Greens again while I smiled through gritted teeth.
So here are a few ideas to save your Christmas and set you up to win the ‘Gift of the Season’ award with the men in your life; because that’s what it’s about isn’t it.
It’s no longer about the gift; it’s a competition to buy the best gift that once again establishes you as the coolest wife or girlfriend or fling-to-leave-a-lasting-impression and wipe out all other women from his mind, including his mother.
1. Buy Him Craft Beer
Nothing says ‘I am cool’ like him drinking a bottle of unique, craft beer around a braai while his plebeian friends sip on their mass-produced, mass-marketed swill. It will immediately set you apart as an uber-girl and some of the coolness of craft beer will rub off on you. It’s called the ‘halo effect’.
2. Buy Him a Case of Craft Beer.
If one craft beer works miracles, think of what a case of craft beer will do. The halo effect works in emergencies too: like that time you bought those shoes and he hit the roof when he heard the price (and you’d already halved it). Next time, smooth his ruffled chest hairs with a box of hand-selected craft beers from the League of Beers (www.leagueofbeers.com). This year’s selection for December is a chart-topper of the best of what’s around (the best possible beers that Rob Heyns could get his hands on) and includes some rare, unique beauties. Plus they deliver too.
3. Subscribe Him to the Beer of the Month Club
Same as the above, except once a month for a week he’ll be grinning from ear to ear, sipping on a new cold one while reading the (brewing) notes and hand-written card just for him. You’ll learn all about hops and yeast while he expounds on which beer is better and why. Bliss. Plus he won’t even notice those new pumps you’re wearing.
You can thank us later. Happy holidays!