Postscript to the Atkins Revolution

Postscript to the Atkins Revolution

Edward Chamberlain-Bell

By Edward Chamberlain-Bell

According to proponents of a high protein diet we would all be doing ourselves, and humanity, a great favour if we shunned carbohydrates altogether.

Apparently, all carbohydrates, especially white bread, rice, potatoes and sugar are the nutritional equivalent of a sexually transmitted disease- and it probably goes without saying that it is easier to hide a sexually transmitted disease than it is to hide a few extra pounds.

Notwithstanding the fact that carbohydrates are a major food group which the body breaks down into energy, they also boost Serotonin & Tryptophan, the feel good chemicals that also regulate sleep patterns- which practically makes carbohydrates as addictive as schedule five medications. However it gets worse, while the humble spud practically rivals a methadone clinic, their fluctuating glycemic indexes contributes towards massive mood swings. Which are never a good thing for neither the casual swinger or the spectator.

On the other side of the scale, so to speak, proteins, are believed to expedite rapid weight loss and can have you thinner within days but have the unpleasant side-effects of bad breathe and the unfashionable urge to urinate more frequently than one would like in public. This leaves us with the attractive choices of either being over-weight and sedate or becoming a hyperactive anorexic sniff out the last remaining breath mint in public toilets.

Anyone with a social circle slightly wider than a sociopath already knows that there are enough fat, stupid and lazy people without our diet contributing another but I can count among my best friends, people who not only feel good about themselves but have admirable bladder control. These are important considerations when hosting parties which include people and upholstered furniture.

After giving both choices the deliberation which they are due, one wonders if there is room for a balanced diet that combines the best of both carbohydrates and proteins.

It may be unfashionable right now, but somehow I like the idea of a balanced diet.

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